Our body is nature


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For a long time, I thought of nature as just a nice place to be in, and it felt good to be in the forest or by the sea, but I didn’t pay much more attention than that. Now though, after immersing myself in many ways of reconnecting with the natural world - I sense there is a whole lot more to our relationship with nature that connects with the practice of Focusing.

We talk of listening to the body in Focusing, but what is the body? Read More...
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Rewilding the soul

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In ecology and conservation, there's a lot of talk about rewilding. It has become a buzzword even. For good reason, our dwindling diversity in our countryside and on our planet more widely is causing widespread disruption and breakdown, so the call for rewilding is more than just a fad. In some ways our long term survival even depends on it.

It's true to say that what happens outside of us is a reflection of what happens inside. That how we treat the outer world reflects in part, how we treat ourselves. So what does our domesticated and over controlled outer landscape say about our inner world? Or you could ask; what have we done to our own psyches and souls within this outer system of control and dominance? What aspects of us have we kept out of our wild psyches to keep comfortable and just get on with life. What line have we drawn that says this is allowed and this is not allowed? Read More...
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Welcoming Back the Collective Exiles of Death and Grief

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I have always loved the invitation of "What wants attention?" to open a Focusing process. In my life as a Focusing teacher and in my personal practice as a Focuser, I used to think that this invitation was enough for whatever wanted attention to show up: that after I made that initial opening, the rest would happen by itself; that all I had to do was open the door and whatever wanted to be seen would wander though. Maybe it would take time to come, but eventually it would come and be heard and met. I had this image of opening a door and waiting... 

But what if that ‘something’ on the other side of the door has not only been kept out by protective forces in you but has been exiled by the larger collective. What if that ‘something’ has showed up at many doors over and over and been turned away, hundreds and thousands of times... and what if it had done this for generations. How would it feel to be that something? Imagine being such an exile. Would it be enough to see an open door for you to go in, would you trust it after all the rejections? I doubt it. Read More...
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What does welcoming mean?

I love the word "welcoming" and I use it a lot in my courses and sessions with people. I invite myself and others to "welcome" feelings or parts of themselves that arise in focusing... and I wanted to share what I really meant by it as it's one of those words that means different things to different people and can easily be misunderstood. Read More...
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"You matter" - the implicit and essential message of Focusing

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It is a tragic truth that too may of us go through life feeling that our life does not matter, that what we deeply feel, value and believe does not matter, that even our existence does not matter. I meet many people that in some way had this message given to them as a child. Their feelings and inner life was not of value or worse, that how they were, was in some way not allowed or too much, flawed or damaged... Their sense of mattering in the world was broken or compromised. Imagine living in a world where you feel your life has no consequence? That your experience does not count in any way. Maybe you life, or aspects of it, was somewhat like that?

To feel we matter is an essential need. Even the word "matter" brings a lot. It speaks of substance and has its origins in latin words for origin, source and mother. When we matter we feel substantial, we feel real. Our existence in the world is noticed, is valued and cherished. It is an essential "message" to give to each other and an essential thing to feel.
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