Big Kindness

I want to share something that has been happening for a few years in my Focusing practice... and it’s about what I am calling big kindness. It happens like this: I’m exploring some theme around a difficulty, for example - my habit of spending too much time on the internet and researching products... and in that exploration I meet various parts of myself with empathy and understanding... and then in that exploration, it’s like I sense a bigger picture Read More...
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Who is navigating your life? or "why are you looking at your phone daddy?"



Recently my son Albie, who is 6, has been asking me "why are you looking at your phone daddy?" It's easy to lie or fudge an answer to be honest but very often it's because I am either restless or needing some way or removing myself from the painful present. It's a habit... and addiction and a useful handheld device that helps my life.

At heart. my son's question is vital and alive... it invites me to stop and ask, why? Why am I doing this? and it's a question I am growing more fond of. It's not a demanding question or critical… it's not "WHY? am I doing this? (and you know you shouldn't)" It is a more curious enquiry... what is beneath this thing I am doing ? What is wanted right now? Read More...
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Facing uncertainty



In truth, we are always living in uncertain times. Yet, right now it seems more evident or closer to the surface, but that thread of uncertainty is woven into everything and who knows when it will unravel. I have always been struck by this phrase from a ancient Buddhist teacher Shantideva "in a moment life breaks its word". This was not supposed to happen! - some part of us cries, "not to me or them"... change always brings shock, fear and struggle.

So. when we face that cliff edge of the unknown, how can focusing help us there? Read More...
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